Thursday, November 20, 2008

Dating Etiquette and the Holidays



Dating takes on a special flavor during the holidays. It's not the easiest time to be alone. Men seem more interested in dating. Everyone is more stressed, and everyone gets more emotional.

Good time to practice your emotional intelligence skills and your dating manners. Here are some tips:

1. Stick to regular dating rules. Keep the first dates short and sweet - an hour or so for lunch; 2 hours for dinner.
2. Resist those extra urges at this time of year to "spill." Yeah you've got memories ... so does he. Stay in the present
3. Speaking of presents, if you're early-on in dating, choose a small gift that isn't too dramatic or suggestion - for him, a pair of gloves, for her a bottle or perfume. For several months, ladies. let him do the giving and the doing.
4. DO NOT GIVE GIFT CARDS. They are worse than no gift at all in a dating situation.
5. Ladies - if your family is giving a big 'do' and you're tempted to ask him to it, remember - he asks YOU to meet HIS family first. No exceptions.
5. Take it easy on the office party. Even people who've been dating a while dread going to their SO's office party. They're work, not fun.
6. If you're just getting to know each other, don't set yourself up by going something too sentimental - like somewher you used to go to with So-and-So, or a movie that's a tear jerker. Keep it light.
7. If early dating, no inviting him over for a cozy meal in front of the Christmas treet. Enticing yes ... but it's too soon!

REMEMBER YOUR MANNERS. It's confusing today and nobody knows what to do? Well, that's why there's etiquette. And Dating Etiquette.

Marilyn was dating. She had 3 teens and 2 fosters kids, law school debts, a new job and was pretty much in over her head. Christopher arrived at her house to pick her up for a date. He said, "I hope you won't mind if you say this. I've been yelled at about this before by other women. I'm just trying to help. It's just that I noticed your tires are low. Would you get mad if I asked if I could fix that for you?"

Marilyn burst into tearsm she was so grateful. Since when it is "rude" to offer to help someone?

Use the real dating etiquette. If the other party doesn't like it, then you
have information."

This means:

1. Mute the cell phone or leave it home.
2. Gentlemen -- Open doors. Hold the chair out at the restaurant table.
3. The man makes the reservations and deals with the maitre d' and orders for the woman after finding out what she wants.
4. The man pays for the first dates.
5. The woman expresses gratitude for each action of etiquette. It is not to be taken for granted. Especially these days. If he goes around to open the car door for you, say "thank you."
6. Thank the man for the date and the lovely evening.
7. Use the old rule - reward what you want more of; ignore what you want to go away. If he does something right, let him know. If he does something wrong, make it subtly clear, hope it goes away, and see.
8. Except for gross improprieties, give each other a second chance.

Let me guide you in your quest for the Love of Your Life. For Dating Coaching, email me at sdunn@susandunn.cc . I'm attract your dream partner expert for a leading internet site and consistently receive ratings of 10 on knowledge, politeness, timeliness, and expertise.

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